Knowing yourself is step number one in online dating and step one in every other area of your life. If part of you wants some casual dating fun, while another part of you wants long-term commitment, your profile will portray that inconsistency.
Pick your path and stick to it. PlentyOfFish has the reputation of being more of a hookup site and less of a dating site although you can certainly find quality relationships through it.
Whichever site you choose, make sure you pay attention to how high the entry barrier is set. If you can create a profile and go public with less than ten minutes of work, then so can everyone else. While a site with minimal effort might mean a larger dating pool to scan, it may also indicate a lack in quality profiles. Ideally, you want to look for a site that requires a decent amount of effort for entry so that you know that the women you will be interacting with are as serious about their love lives as you are.
Instead of stating that you have high standards, simply communicate your standards with the preferences you have naturally built into your profile. In the digital world, women are expertly adept at detecting incongruence.
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So instead of telling them who you are, allow your boundaries, preferences, and lifestyle speak for you. You have two options when it comes to crafting your profile… 1 be broad with your preferences in order to attract the highest number of potential matches, or 2 be as specific as possible in regards to your preferences so as to attract the most aligned partner possible.
You will attract higher quality matches and save yourself time. Perhaps space travel excites you. Or maybe you really love chess. Possibly you find elephants to be the most interesting creatures.
Or it might be that anime really gets you fired up. Luckily, the internet allows you access to millions of women and chances are there is someone out there who gets just as excited about those things as you do!
Nobody likes to feel duped and these people come across as liars and rightfully so the first time they meet their potential matches. Studies have proven that certain types of photos get the best results in terms of profile views and received messages.
Think about including photos of yourself with a mixed gender group of friends.
These online dating profile examples...
Also include photos of yourself with your pet or photos of yourself doing interesting and unique activities. These types of photos tend to get higher rates of views and messages.
If you are someone who...
As always, make sure whatever photos you include on your profile are congruent with who you are. Mouth breathers not your thing? No tolerance for homophobic people? Do you need to date someone who falls within a certain height range? Many men have resorted to firing off copy and paste messages to hundreds of women to see what comes of it. First off, you respect women more than that. And second, you respect yourself and your time more than that!
Then, message only a few of your prospective partners per week. And be sure you are sending them high quality messages. What does a high quality message look like? It is basically the opposite of a generic message that could be copy and pasted to hundreds of women. A high quality message is specific.
Of course, messaging a handful of women per month Description of yourself for hookup site give you a lower number of dates, but the dates you do go on have a much higher probability of being successful. In the book The Paradox of Choice, author Barry Schwartz discusses the impact of excessive options on consumers- the presentation of more options makes for more confused, irritable, and ultimately unhappy shoppers who often question their final decision.
This concept can be tied to online dating- if you spend months scanning thousands of profiles, you start to lose touch with the fact that each profile you view is tied to a human in the real world. The possibility of discontentment in your ultimate decision is very real and you might delay choosing as a result.
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I would highly recommend taking a few precautions to avoid overindulging in never-ending profile scanning. First, focus on your profile and make it as you-congruent as possible before looking anywhere else on the site point 3. Next, search the site using highly-targeted filters that present you with your best possible matches. Some dating sites charge for this feature but it Description of yourself for hookup site often worth the low monthly cost! And finally, if you know that you have an addictive personality when it comes to searching through stimulation, set a limit to the number of profiles you will allow yourself to see on a daily basis.
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The more in touch with reality you are when it comes to searching for your dream girl online, the more time you will save and the better your messages will be received.
When you find a connection that interests you, get in the habit of setting up a coffee date or exchanging phone numbers or Facebook information within the first five to ten messages. So value both of your time and get off the site as soon as possible.
Description of yourself for hookup site comment originally appeared at Quora. This post originally appeared at Jordan Gray Consulting. A new Thought Catalog series exploring our connection to each other, our food, and where it comes from.
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